Gaslighted

Was I being gaslighted

Gaslighted by my late spouse

To be his servant night and day

Away and in the house?

The more I think

The more I know

That this had been

Exactly so

Not only was I in the house

But his office manager too

And his chef for all his meals

But now that he’s dead, I’m through

I think I knew this all along

Deep within my brain

But why did I put up with it?

Was I that insane?

I thought of myself as being

The lovely perfect wife

And working for him as a career

Without being paid – how nice!

But he did pay for some courses I took

In college when it cost less

But graduate school –- forget it

I did that long after his death 

I now look back and I wonder

Was the whole thing such a blunder?

I now live where I love and love where I live

But I just cannot forget and forgive

Although I don’t forget and forgive

Life now is working out for me

I’m doing everything I love

And it is all my cup of tea